Blog | Personal Finance

What to Think of Your Thoughts

Your thoughts are yours alone to live with. How you deal with them will make all the difference

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In my last article I wrote about how our little voice is often that inner voice that is telling us not to do something. That’s when we need to pause and ask why. Where is it coming from? What emotions are tied to it? What’s the real issue?

That little voice usually comes down to something that’s happening in our lives that reminds us of something that previously happened in our life which has negative emotions tied to it.

But not always.

Sometimes that little voice was planted there by other people. It could have been our teachers, parents, friends, spouse, family or even close friends that were merely trying protect us.

As we grow older and face greater challenges, we often find ourselves confronted with different thoughts and perspectives than we had growing up.

Small Town Boy All Grown Up

I remember the decision I made to leave my small hometown in Ohio to attend college three hours away. My parents were even more upset when, upon graduating from college, I decided to pack my bags and move to Hawaii. For years afterward, they tried to convince me to come home.

I’ve since moved to California, Arizona, Lake Tahoe, and then back again to Arizona. You’ll notice they are all a good distance from Ohio. Was it because I hate my family? Far from it! I love them dearly. It’s the conditioning I received during my childhood that I needed to buffer myself from.

My parents (and family as a whole) were grooming me to be an employee, or someone who works alone. That’s not who I am, or who I wanted to be.

Striving to become gainfully employed is great advice for some people, but not for me. I always wanted to run a business.

When I began my career after graduating college, it wasn’t the business deals or assessing investment opportunities that were the hard part. The true battlefield was between my ears. Because of my previous conditioning, I had a very difficult time achieving my goals because of that little voice.

Your Little Voice to the Power of Six

I’ve heard the expression that you are a reflection of the six people you spend the most time with. If that’s true, think about who you spend the most time with.

What are their values and goals? Are yours inline with theirs? What do they do with their spare time? Are you a greater influence on them or can you pinpoint more of their attributes in you?

This is an important exercise to do for yourself. The findings may be uncomfortable to confront but necessary to discover.

After pondering the answers, you may recognise specific thought patterns you haves that you’ve learned from your spouse from your college days, your mother from high school or even a teacher from grade school. Unfortunately you can’t blame them for your actions. The thoughts are yours and yours alone.

Though these thoughts may bring up negative emotions, it’s not necessarily a bad thing. I’ve had great coaches throughout my life that taught me endurance, leadership and tenacity. I wasn’t thrilled with their methods but have grown to appreciate the lessons.

It’s up to you what to make of those thoughts. Will you let the emotion tied to the message bring you down…or empower you to move mountains?

If you want to learn more about mastering your little voice, get a copy of my book, Little Voice Mastery.

Original publish date: November 20, 2018

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